The Old Ones Are Best


This makes me snigger every time- an oldie, but a goodie...


if you receive an e-mail entitled 'Bedtimes,' delete it IMMEDIATELY. Do not
open it. Apparently this one is pretty nasty. It will not only erase everything
on your hard drive, but it will also delete anything on disks within 20 feet of
your computer. It demagnet izes the strips on ALL of your credit cards. It
reprograms your ATM access code, screws up the tracking on your VCR, and uses
subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you attempt to play. It will
program your phone auto dial to call only 0898 numbers. This virus will mix
antifreeze into your fish tank.
IT WILL CAUSE YOUR TOILET TO FLUSH WHILE YOU ARE SHOWERING.
It will drink ALL your beer.
FOR GOD'S SAKE, ARE YOU LISTENING? ?
It will leave dirty underwear on the coffee table when you are expecting
company.
It will replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine If the
'Bedtimes' message is opened in a Windows 95/98 environment, it will leave the
toilet seat up and leave your hair dryer plugged in dangerously close to a full
bathtub of water. It will not only remove the forbidden tags from your
mattresses and pillows, it will also refill your skim milk with whole milk.
***
WARN AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN.
***
And if you don't send this to 5000 people in 20 seconds, you'll fart so hard
that your right leg will spasm and shoot straight out in front of you, sending
sparks that will ignite the person nearest you.
Send this warning to everyone!!!
THERE'S A LOT OF SADNESS IN THE WORLD! Right now, as you read this, 17 Million people are having SEX!!!
And look at you -- you're on the computer!!!!